What If You're Closer Than You Think?

You probably don't have a really accurate idea of how good or how bad you are with women.  If I asked you, you might readily have an idea of NOT being able to get women, but I genuinely doubt most any guy (including you) can tell how close they are to actual vaginal freedom (people say financial freedom, so figured I'd try that one on for size).  

So my question to you today is what if you're closer than you think?  What if you were just a few adjustments away from getting FAR better results with women?  You make the adjustment then immediately notice that your sets are working way better, girls are liking you more, and previous "No's" turn into "Yes's" when you ask for a number.  

How would you ever know how close you are to success beyond what you ever thought possible?  

You wouldn't.  

You might even quit.  

This past couple of weekends I did one-on-one trainings and BOTH of my clients were closer to glory than they think, so I wanna tell you about these two cases.  

First off, I want to differentiate quickly between skills and strategy.  Skills are body language, delivery, tonality, reading the women, etc. and strategy is picking the style of game you're doing (direct, indirect, social circle, warm) and inside of that strategy you might also pick further strategy.  

Are you one adjustment away?  

So first case a couple weeks ago, we'll call him Jim.  We're going out again tonight and I'm going to tell Jim about strategy because I think one adjustment could be the thing for him.  Jim is quiet and Jim is a singer songwriter.  Will he ever be a cold approach guy?  Doubtful.  So what do we do with guys like Jim?  Well, we can still work on cold approach as a method to understand and practice attraction for Jim, but wouldn't it be MUCH more effective to get Jim up on stage in front of an audience where women can see him in his element?  

Problem is Jim has no band and no audience.  

My plan with Jim is to hook him up with some musicians and use connections I've got here in Los Angeles to get him on stage on an "off" night at a bar that will still be busy.  Jim plays, women see it, the bar gets free/cheap entertainment, and then after the show Jim starts talking to women and being available socially to those who might have seen him play.  He can even "warm" approach now because he will know what women watched the show.  After all, he was looking at crowd and I'm sure musicians are aware of people in the audience.  

This one adjustment to Jim's strategy can change his life.  Instead of no band, no audience, no place to play, and no women, now it's the opposite.  A weekly gig has turned into an INCOME STREAM of new women for Jim, and ROTATIONS LOVE INCOME STREAMS OF NEW INTERACTIONS.  

Can your approaching be an income stream?  Sure

Do you work at the Verizon Wireless Store?  Doubt HR would love it, but that's an income stream too.  

What's your income stream?  If women are showing up and you're a leader somewhere, then that's yours.  The quieter you are, the more you need this income stream.  

Top of the list for income streams like this would be things like tattoo artist, musician, etc.  

Okay guy #2. 

Client #2 came last weekend and we've worked about 4-5 sessions or maybe a month on material.  He's got openers and attraction routines and he's been using them with low levels of success.  In fact, he was cool about it but my read was he was getting frustrated with the lack of success from using the material and when we talked a couple weeks before the training he asked me if I had any adjustments for him and I told him I don't make adjustments before I see him.  I don't think he liked that.  

Remember, you just can't see what you can't see.  

So night one we go out and I demo all night.  He gets to see me attract the two hottest women we talked to that night.  One was a blonde 36 year old and the other a younger (maybe 25 year old) bartender.  

His turn to approach the next couple of nights, and although he believed there was something we needed to fix about his routines, it was OBVIOUS to me that we immediately needed to work on energy calibration, positioning, and body language.  

He was getting crushed before he opened his mouth.  

So I know I said one fix and this is kind of 3 I'm listing here, but hear me out:  

Positioning:  He's static and facing the girl less than 90 degrees, and he's tall so his closeness in proximity to the girl feels like he's the boogeyman grabbing her from above, so we install the sprinkler routine. 

Energy calibration:  He's moving fast through his routine, moving his head fast, and all while the women he's talking to are calm, and this difference in "energy" is ruining his sets because women are viewing his energy as nervousness (and it might just be).  

Body Language:   He's not taking up much space, is a little hunched over, chin is down.  

Why are these one fix?  Because standing with correct posture while taking up more space in the proper position is kind of one fix.  Now he's calm, has huge presence, and can move around a bit when he needs to because he's aware of how women feel when he talks to them.    He fixes all through problems with one solid adjustment.  

This is a HUGE win for him.  I even felt just by his new posture like  and he's about to see how well his approaches go from here on out once those adjustments are solidified.  

So what if you're just one adjustment away from glory like this?  

Most guys are.  

So I'm not gonna lie to you I almost always have to see you game in person to find this stuff.  And I need to see enough sets from you that I can pick out what's happening.  I think the minimum is like 3-5 sets for me to start seeing a pattern of what's going on.  

Sometime's I can pickup some hints just from a Zoom Call.  

I can't promise you anything of course, however if you haven't had an investigation into your strategy and your game in awhile, I would be more than happy to jump on a free call with you and see if we can figure out what might be up with you.  We might just get you somewhere with no money spent (and I'm happy to do that!).  For others I can recommend a path forward.  

SETUP A FREE CALL WITH ME BY CLICKING HERE!  

Cheers and talk to you guys soon. 

4 Guys. 90 Days. 3 Women Each.

 I need 4 guys. 90 days. 3 women each.

I'm about to try something I've never done before.

I'm looking for 4 guys in Los Angeles who are willing to let me personally coach them for 90 days — and I'm going to see if I can get each of them actively dating 3 women at the same time.

Yes. Three.

I'm going to document the experiment and turn it into a YouTube series.

You'll see the guys before we start, what they're struggling with, what I change, what happens when we actually go out into the real world, the wins, the failures, the awkward moments, and where each guy ends up after 90 days.

I'm not looking for four guys who already have their shit together.

In fact, I'd prefer guys who have a genuine problem with dating right now.

Maybe you can't get dates.

Maybe you get dates but can't turn them into anything.

Maybe you're terrified of approaching women.

Maybe you've been out of the game for years.

Maybe you keep getting the same results over and over again and have no idea why.

That's exactly what I'm interested in.

The catch: this is going to require a real commitment.

You'll need to:

• Be located in the Los Angeles area
• Commit to the full 90 days
• Be willing to go out and actually do the work
• Be coachable and willing to try things outside your comfort zone
• Be willing to have your progress documented on camera
• Be comfortable with your story and the coaching process appearing on YouTube/social media
• Be available for regular coaching sessions and filming
• Be willing to invest financially in the program

I'm intentionally not putting the price in this email yet because I'm still working out the exact structure of the first group.

If you're seriously interested, email me back with:

1. Your age

2. Where you live

3. Your current dating situation

4. What you think your biggest problem with women is

5. How long you've been dealing with it

6. What you've already tried

7. What you would want to have accomplished 90 days from now

8. How much time you can realistically commit each week

9. Why you think you'd be good for this experiment

10. Whether you're comfortable being filmed and appearing publicly in the series

And most importantly:

Tell me why you want this badly enough to actually follow through.

I'm going to personally select the four guys.

This isn't going to be a dating course.

I'm not going to sit in front of a whiteboard and tell you what you're doing wrong.

We're going into the real world and finding out.

I've been a dating coach since 2007, and I've spent the better part of two decades studying attraction, dating and relationships.

Now I want to see what happens when I put everything I've learned into one experiment.

Four guys.

Ninety days.

Three women each.

Let's see what happens.

— Jake

You Can't Prepare Your Way Out Of Paying The Price

I wanted to minimize embarrassment and pain, too.  

I wanted to not have to walk up to women and get my ass handed to me.  

I thought that if I prepared enough for every possible outcome, that I could avoid pain.  

Then... 

When I started approaching, I realized that what I was experiencing was FAR different than what I had imagined.  Women said different things.  Sometimes, women were nicer.  Sometimes they were harsh out of nowhere.  

Most importantly, many of the dream negative outcomes I thought would happen never did.  

So how does this relate to you?  

Well...  

With basically every client I get, we'll get into answering questions that go something like this:

"If she does _____, then what do I do???"  

Questions in this format are great and can often lead to some specifically good preparation.  For instance, I believe a guy should know what indicators women give to show attraction or to show interest.  He should know what the stages of the interaction are, and he should be able to make some basic adjustments.  He should know what common responses and actions take place in a dominance struggle.  

But this is where our conversation always seems to go off the rails a bit.  

Sometimes I'll get a "if she does X, then what should I do" question, and my answer is simply "Well, she won't do that."  The next question is always "Yeah, but if she does though... then what do I do."  

Same answer. 

So what's going on here?   

I believe what's going on is some form of self protection mechanism.  It's like "if I can figure out everything that will possibly happen in an interaction, then maybe I can approach without experiencing pain and suffering embarrassment.  

Unfortunately it doesn't work that way.  

WE CAN'T SHIELD OURSELVES FROM PAYING THE PRICE WE HAVE TO PAY TO GET GOOD AT DATING BY SOMEHOW FIGURING OUT EVERY SITUATION THAT MIGHT HAPPEN BEFORE IT EVER DOES.  

The reality is that anyone who is learning a dating skillset must go through the hard work and tough emotions associated with having bad sets and rejection.  Those tough emotions shape our character and help us grow one of the most important attributes that you'll see in any man:  A THICK SKIN.  

A thick skin is built, not bought.  You can't think it into existence.  It's ONLY the product of experience providing a mindset that failures and negative reactions from women have no bearing on your identity or value as a man.  

Need an example?  Try this one on for size:  Next time you get a blowout where you try to open and the girl basically is like "fuck off," try turning around 180 degrees from her and opening the very next girl you see with the exact same opener.  When you get a shit reaction from a woman and then the very next one loves the opener, you'll get to see right in front of your face that you and the opener were never the issue in the first place.  This is your introduction to the many lessons to be acquired from the practice of cold approach.  

I can tell you all about this like I just have, but it's entirely different when you experience it first hand.  

When YOU TAKE ACTION, your personality and character grow in a way that me telling you about my experiences can never replicate.  

One more quick example.  

I have an immersion student in Chicago, we'll call him Mike.  

Now Mike has heard the above analogy before.  He "knows" that after a blowout you should go open the next set with the same opener.  So we're walking into the club and he does his first opener, and the girl is a fucking bitch to him.  It's so jarring that to him that he gets very angry.  I think I told the girl something to the effect of fuck you don't say that to my friend, lol.  I'm calm, I've got a thick skin already, and I'm just emotionally reset in one second and ready to continue.  

I look back and I can see he's fucking flustered.  He says "What the fuck man???  What am I supposed to do now???"  I'm like go do another set, then another one, then another one, and push through.  

The reality is that when you get fucked with badly, it's very hard to regulate back to a good state.  

So I demo.  

I tell him "here's what you do."  Then I take a deep breath, put a big smile on my face, and I go approach the hottest girl I can see.  In this case it was a disgustingly hot young girl.   I walk up, start talking, and within maybe a minute or two I'm making out with the hottest girl in the entire bar BY FAR.  I look back and he's shaking his head like "what in the fuck?!?????"  He can't believe it.  

I can't teach you emotional regulation like that.  It ONLY comes from going through that exact situation that he went through and adjusting accordingly.  

YOU must pay the price like Mike did.  

YOU can't prepare your way out of experiencing tough shit.  

YOU must do the work.  

Sometimes, the answer is just "well, that won't happen."  

So what's the antidote for this style of thinking?  What's the antidote for endless preparation and "perfection before action"???

Say this phrase to yourself:  

WHATEVER HAPPENS, I CAN HANDLE IT.  

The reality is that you, just like Mike, will have tough sets.  You will adjust on the fly.  

 You will have tough emotions.  You can handle them.  

Life will fucking suck.  You can handle it.  

People will die.  You can handle it.  

It's just talking to girls, man...  You can handle it.  

You can't prepare your way out of paying the price it takes to get good... 

And most importantly...

You wouldn't want to screw yourself out of the man you become by paying it.  

600k Followers and GUESSING out in public.

Alright guys here we go... shit testing in action.  

I'm easing into YouTube and quite honestly I'm not trying to create a brand where I fuck with people.  I know from the past 20 years of coaching, that if a guy has a good experience with one coach he's more likely to try another one.  But if he feels like he got robbed then "everyone is out to rob me" becomes his mentality.  

That said, when you buy dating coaching you're literally paying for the coaches perception, and nothing else.  The info is out there, the routines are out there, the structure is out there.

YOU NEED SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTANDS WHAT THE FUCK THEY'RE LOOKING AT.  

The guy in this video doesn't.  

I've done two reaction videos now and on the first one Michael Sartain is talking about "milk toast" dating coaches, and I'm starting to think this is the guy, coach Kyle on YouTube.  he's got like 600k followers and he's fucking GUESSING.  

in this video you get to see how a shit test is formulated first hand.  She adds up evidence and comes to the conclusion this dudes is an inexperienced incel.  Then Coach Kyle says the student is confident and it's fine to talk about being an incel, because he doesn't understand what's really going on.  

To me (snap judgement), he looks like a young coach who hasn't suffered and had to think much about game.  He's just been lucky enough to go direct, have it "work" and now he's a "coach."  

But!  I can't expect everyone to figure out dominance struggles and shit tests the way I have.  So I need to try my best to water things down and put some breadcrumbs in front of this guy because it's good for all of us and my entry into popularity doesn't have to be hating on everyone.  

Next up...

What in the fuck is going on in 2026??? I feel like I've been transported to another dimension where pickup is okay now?  Like the general public isn't shitting on us like they used to, kids (21 year olds) are making videos about approaching and the 3 second rule and they have 300k followers for it?  Makes me wanna have a resurgence like Limp Bizkit or something.  

I think it's super cool how all of our work from 20 years ago is coming alive in this way, and it's hard for me to wrap my head around. 

PLEASE, if you watch this video and care at all about me give it a like and a comment cause I'm really trying to grow this and reach guys who need a guy like me and not this guy.  

Cheers and thanks.

There are 2 Reasons You're Getting Shit Tested

 There are two different reasons you're getting shit tested.  Many years ago I argued in my Dominance Struggle posts that "she's definitely not shit testing you because she takes you seriously" and I was wrong about that.  At the time I was seeing so much evidence of only one type of shit testing my students were receiving (the kind to get you to go away) that I wasn't readily aware of the other type.  So today I want to go over them both.  

Here we go...

Type 1 - This is the type of shit test where the girl wants you to go away.  The process here is you approach, you unknowingly demonstrate some qualities that give the girl evidence to paint a picture of you that you're not a dominant guy.  She that perception of you to craft a test designed to get you to go away by pointing out or throwing in your face your readily apparent inadequacies, which she's generally quite accurate about.  Have you seen the same shit test from different women and it's about you?  This is type 1.  

Type 2 - This is a qualifying style shit test I haven't commonly talked or written about yet, and yes, it's happening when she is taking you seriously.  It's basically a glaring neon sign she likes you, but needs to go through her "standard routine" of tests before she can allow herself to like you.  As you remove mistakes with women and your approaches get better, you'll begin to notice a girl giving you more general social skills shit tests.  These are usually a cluster of 3-5 shit tests not specifically about you or your personality,  Instead, they're things like direct social challenges, misdirection, trying to derail your leading of the set, etc.  to see how you handle them.  This reads essentially "I think I like you but I gotta try X, Y, and Z first to verify what I think I'm seeing.  

Again, you'll know the difference between these because type 1 is directed at your personal characteristics, and when you lose you'll get a feeling you weren't good enough for her, and type 2 is more general social skills that don't seem to be about you personally.  I noticed type 1 before I got good, and then as soon as I got good it was like ALL Type 1 tests vanished out of thin air, and all that was left were type 2, which (for me) are now the only ones I see in my sets.

Cheers.  

How Do You "Wear The Pants" in Your Relationship? (A Roadmap)

From the very first time she sees you, your entire relationship is all about the struggle for dominance between you and her.  Starting at that first glimpse, scrutiny begins.  Everything she does seeks to isolate if you're a dominant guy.  Establish dominance and she's attracted.  Maintain it and she's yours forever.  Fail either, and lose her 100 times out of 100.  

Today I want to break down this process of continued scrutiny and dominance so it's clear what you're going through from the second you see her to the second it ends or lives forever. 

Pre-approach. 

She sees you and scrutiny begins.  It's not outward yet, it's in her head.  How do you look?  Well dressed?  Fit?  Groomed?  Weird?  Did she get an actual chance to look you over and have actual scrutiny?  (hint:  if she didn't, you should use the sprinkler technique on your approach so she can take you in).  

Do you meet the bar?  Are you good enough for her to even listen to anything you have to say?  Or does she have to stop you from talking immediately?  

Not qualifying means she has to stop you from even opening your mouth, and you get a blowout.  (Worth noting here that the same blowout applies when she just isn't available, or about 20% of sets). 

The Approach.  

When you meet the minimum requirements she has, the compliance you get when you open your mouth is she will listen and remain neutral and reserved.  You're talking 100% at the start and she's just watching. 

Are you communicating confidence?  Are you in a good state?  Are you demonstrating qualities that tell the story that you're a prized and desired guy?  Are you a 'top' guy??? 

She's hunting for it.  

Two things happen right now.  If you aren't standing up to her scrutiny then you'll get a "go away" style blowout (like "I have a boyfriend" if you've telegraphed interest prematurely).  

If she's taking you seriously then she'll give you a "qualifying" style shit test.  These take on many forms (direct "what's with your shoes" type stuff, acting too immediately sexual with you, misdirection, frame theft, etc).  

In a group setting?  The one testing you is the one with the most interest in whether or not you're a pre-selected guy.  

Not qualifying here means you leave feeling like you weren't good enough for her.  I'm sure you know this feeling well... I know I do.  

Succeed here and she'll show signs of attraction, flirt, and seek to prove herself to you (think "what's your name" or "where are you from" or touches your necklace and asks you about it.  Then she'll want you to know that she's cool, attractive, and desirable just like you.  She'll try to align herself with you if it's a group setting.

Let me make this clear:  What just happened is you demonstrated attractiveness, she checked if it was real, then once she believes you're qualified she starts making it clear she's interested and tries to demonstrate her attractiveness to you.  

The Close.  

If you have managed to missed all the signals during the approach or have no idea if she views you as a dominant, attractive guy, then this is where you get an obvious sign in the form of her saying no.  

Yes, you can still not have established dominance with her and still get a phone number.  95% of men aren't establishing dominance in the interaction, so women have to get laid somehow, and her saying yes to contact information just demonstrates you haven't exhausted your margin for error yet.  She still needs more evidence.  

The Date, Sex, Sex 3x, and The Relationship.  

The rules here are all the same:  meet the minimum requirements for dominance and she will continue scrutiny and further the relationship, even if you're not interpersonally dominant with her.  

Scrutiny here comes in the form of picking, prodding, poking, fights, and bullshit.  It's the fight about a meaningless pencil and the way you handle it.  It's the jab at your self esteem and how you handle it.  It's the boundary she explores to see if it's real. She's testing your actual level of dominance through experimentation so she can hone in on your exact level of dominance.  

It's only when she understands exactly your measure of dominance that she can relax and "feel safe" as they say.

Failing to be dominant or not quite being dominant enough during this phase can take DECADES before a breakup happens.  Establishing dominance can (at a minimum) happen at the pace she exhausts herself of incessant knee-jerk whims to test you, and at a maximum can literally last the entirety of your life.  Ever seen that couple who still fights, breaks up, and gets back together all the time?  They have unestablished interpersonal dominance and she's pushing him because she can't let down until she knows his EXACT measure of dominance. 

Men who don't understand this concept and can't "win" with her sometimes get so frustrated they're pushed to violence as a means of dominance.  Have you hit a woman before?  It's because you're not winning verbally and you're resorting to physical dominance.  Fix your shit, man.  (and for the record, I have never done this, I've just seen it enough to know I should address it for those of us who need to hear it).  

A note on abused women:  Listen man, some women have been abused and don't respond appropriately to "normal" dominance establishment.  In other words, balanced dominance techniques aren't enough for you to establish dominance NO MATTER WHAT.  When I've gotten the feeling before that my normal stuff wasn't working, I wanted to understand this and I ran an experiment.  What happens if I'm verbally abusive?  Would a woman like this respond better?  

Unfortunately yes.  

So a word of caution:  When you have enough experience to understand what constitutes a dominant position in your relationships and "it's not working with this one," it could be because she's been abused and "needs" that same energy to respond with attraction.  

Please run the opposite direction at top speed if you see this.  It is not your job to perform years of therapy, and no good can come from spending more time with women like this.  

I'm serious, run away and don't look back.  

Okay, back to the topic at hand....

Success happens for you when you can establish that you're a dominant guy, establish that you're in the dominant position in the relationship, then maintain your dominant standing from time to time when she pokes her scrutinous head up from time to time and needs reminding that's she's picked correctly.  

Cheers.  

When Is The Time Right To Commit to An Exclusive Relationship?

 Hey guys, 

Just a quick drop-in today to pass an idea by you.  The last YouTube Videos I posted on the Male Hoe Phase has me putting together a quick concept that I believe applies to YOU.  Here's the concept:  

Women have a "hoe" phase where they dip their toes into the sexual water and sleep with as many men as they dare.  Remember that women go through 4 stages of dating:  Boyfriend, Breakup/Depression, Party Mode, Boyfriend Search Mode.  Then they get a boyfriend and repeat.  The Hoe Phase happens in Party Mode.  Women can have multiple hoe phases as these cycles persist in their lives.  They can do this because they have abundance of choice.  They Hoe around and eventually feel guilty and know that it's meaningless and they should search for meaning.  

When a woman finally gets to "boyfriend search mode" she will avidly PUSH a relationship on the next guy in line.  They'll filter him for boyfriend qualities and often do things like withhold sex from him even when they've just been ran through by Chads, because they believe that the best way to get a boyfriend is to first convince him they're not a hoe by making him wait to sleep with them.  

The problem is that MEN OFTEN DON'T GO THROUGH THE SAME PROCESS.  

Her necessity not to feel like a hoe and therefore push commitment on the man doesn't mean the timing is right for him!  

You're allowed to have your own hoe phase.  

So the question becomes who is in the wrong?  Is it the man for not wanting a commitment?  Or is it her for pushing him to commit when he's not ready?  

Women constantly push commitment on men when men aren't ready, then they get super pissed and butthurt when they get ghosted or pumped and dumped.  And it's because BOTH sides aren't aware of how timing should work.  

A man's timing of having exercised his abundance enough to feel ready to look for something deeper in a relationship and the woman's timing of being ready for that MUST match up.  

IT'S OKAY FOR YOU TO TELL A WOMAN THAT YOU'RE NOT READY.  

In fact!  I recommend verbally pumping the brakes like this for a long time in your prospective relationships as a means to both slow down this process and to get the woman to be on her best behavior for you, because when she's looking for that commitment and pushing for you to be just hers, she's going to be the best version of herself before you.  

So what about her being "ran through?"  

Good question.  

Here's our defense.  First off, please know that banging 10 dudes is much different than 100 or 1000.  It's normal for women to sleep around a bit and learn about dating.  It's normal to make mistakes, have regrets, have some growth, etc. so I don't believe we should be holding that against women.  After all, when you attain the ability to have abundance, my guess is you'd like to have sex with more than 10 women too, right?  

So the solution here is to use condoms with any new women you sleep with like it's your religion, and when the times comes that you'd like to not do that anymore, it's time for a trip to the doctor for you both.  I'd recommend you have an adult conversation that goes something like "hey so I can see we're getting more serious, and honestly these condoms suck, so I figured it might be time for us to discuss our future a bit and maybe I can go get tested for you so we both know that we're safe for each other."  I'd recommend you do this around the 4-9 month mark, holding off this happening until she's really obviously wanting it.  

This tactic of verbally pushing her away from you by saying "I'm not ready yet" or "we just met" or "I feel like I don't know you well enough yet" or "I just got out of something serious" etc. (anything to slow down the define the relationship talk) while still being willing to hangout with her, spend time 1-2 times a week max, etc is perfect confusion game and massively amplifies her attraction for you while buying you time to decide between her and other women.  

Remember, you're allowed to experience YOUR abundance before you commit, and men are the gatekeepers of commitment, so NEVER push her for a commitment or even mention it, and watch in amazement as she pushes for it 10 times out of 10.  

Another tip:  Are you seeing her once a week or 2 times at the most and you WANT her to be your girlfriend?  Just change from one time a week to 3-4 times a week hanging out and watch in amazement as she basically instantly wants to know "where this is going" then a week later bitches and moans that you're not her boyfriend.  

Cheers.  

It's a NEW ERA for Dating..

 Hey guys, long time no chat!  Holy moly have I been on a ride since we talked last, lots has happened.  

So let's get up to speed...  

First off, I now have 2 kids, a boy and a girl.  Little girl came first, and the boy second.  I'm with the same girl I've been with for a very long time and in case you're wondering, although we're committed to each other, I don't have Uncle Sam's blessing on my relationship in the form of a contract that will ruin my life if we break up.  So if you're thinking about getting married with an actual contract, remember that you can still tell your partner in 2026 "I'm willing to do all the things associated with marriage... we can have rings, a ceremony with our family and friends, a full lifelong commitment, live together, kids, etc. I just have one requirement and it's that Uncle Sam isn't invited."  That's what I've done and it's fine.  Yes, you can also do a prenup and no, those aren't easy for her to back out of.  However, I MUCH prefer the first option.  Nothing is worse on a guy than having to now pay to leave a relationship and get dragged through courts with half your shit gone, so DO NOT do it.  And that's of course if you didn't already know this... lol.  

Okay on to the next order of business.  What the fuck happened to me over the years?  Okay so I'll give you the recap.  Brad stopped coaching many years ago and started a different business.  We're still to this day buddies and we talk all the time.  All good.  Other coaches:  Glenn I still chat with on the phone maybe once a month.  Gabriel is all over the place in Mexico and back to Los Angeles from time to time, and we chat.  NOLA is crushing real estate down in New Orleans and we talk still on the phone as well.  

Most excitingly, DavidMC (our old Aussie coach from 30/30) and I still chat a couple times a week, and in fact he made it to Los Angeles 2-3 years ago so we could go out and teach him the dominance (or now AI wants me to say Leadership, lol) theory.  He took that and married a hot young girl in Belarus that he has no earthly business impregnating, but he did and now they have a baby as well.  

Let's break down his process so we can all learn from it.  David got his first hot chick in Belarus and she was busting his balls.  He had heard and read about my dominance struggle theory on here and on the phone with me.  Still, when he got this particular girl he was getting angry about losing some fights, etc. and as we talked through her and went through fight by fight, things improved and he got better, but he still ended up breaking up.  

This is normal.  

It's normal any guy learning dominance struggle theory to lose a girl or two on the way to becoming a dominant guy.  This happens because the "picture" she's painted of you is changing into a different one.  Women paint a picture of your dominance level in their heads as they gain experience with you, and although the picture can change and can change fast (like for instance if we're on the phone fixing your relationship day-by-day or week-by-week), often it's the case where a guy has to burn through a girl or two on the way towards becoming the man who can tackle the challenges she throws out on a day to day basis so that the relationship can survive long term.  

Can I save YOUR relationship if it's going a little sideways and getting a little shaky?  

The answer I have to give you sucks because I haven't diagnosed YOUR particular situation, and it's that sometimes it's savable and sometimes it's not.  Also sometimes when I pull the bag off your head because I understand something about her that you don't, commonly it happens that once a guy understands more about the woman he's with, he loses respect for her and WANTS to leave.  That's always an odd transformation for me to "eat popcorn and watch", but it happens.  Funny how men across the board are just cool with a breakup, they just need to understand what's happening so they can draw their own conclusions.  

Mostly, I find that men struggle when a breakup has unknowns, and they thrive once they have an understanding (for real) of what happened... difficult or not.  

DO YOU NEED A DIAGNOSIS?  Use the link on the right side of the blog for my "Store" and I'll hop on a free call with you.  Or just click HERE

Moving on...

With the new wide availability of AI, lots will now change for me, personally. 

For many years now, you've seen me struggling to do things like post regularly, keep a website working, etc. and it's because over the years every time I've thrown 5k or 10k at someone to help me with trying to get all my business ducks in a row, it's failed.  

Sorry.  

But!  It's a new era and with AI access I can now hammer it with editing questions finally pump out a video or two for you guys, so look for more of that coming down the tubes.  The current plan is to use YouTube as my main platform, and I'll post shorts to all the platforms as well (should be the same short for awhile on each platform).   

The best thing you can do to help me out would be to (of course) subscribe, like, and COMMENT so I hopefully reasonably spread my message, because I truly believe (as I'm sure you all know) that I've got THE solution for men out there.  

I CAN USE YOUR SUGGESTIONS FOR VIDEO CONTENT!  Just comment on any video on any platform, and I'll do my best to do a video for you.  In fact, I would love a video question from you somehow so that I can do a video response.  However... this tech shit is still wildly hard for me and I will have to ask AI to walk me through making like a reaction video with a picture-in picture or something.  I'm super newb.  

Which brings to mind...

IF YOU ARE SOMEONE WHO CAN BE A CONTENT EDITOR/POSTER/FILM PERSON FOR ME, I WANT YOUR HELP!  

I'm a top pro in game, no doubt.  And I'm still a top loser in content creation and essentially an unknown.  It's been my bottleneck for real for a long time.  So if you're a guy who is comfortable and can help with this, I'd love to talk with you.  I'm happy to trade learning dating for helping me with content, and if you're in the Los Angeles area I'm happy to do some training in person even.  

IF YOU JUST WANNA LEARN GAME ON A BUDGET I NEED YOU TOO.   

Now I don't want to film women in the bars without them knowing.  Many of you know I've always been against that and I think it's a violation of privacy unless she knows and is okay with the posting.  Even then, she might not be later, so I don't film sets.  

However...

I've been kind of tossing around the idea of doing some YouTube content where I take a couple guys out with a camera guy and I just change a couple guys from 0 women to a 3 girl rotation for YouTube growth purposes.  I would imagine it would me somewhat interview based?  Like we do interviews of the guys before, during, and after trainings, on the street, with theory, etc. and the whole thing is filmed by the content dude (who I'm hoping is one of you).  

I think this could be super cool.  

However...

You MUST be the type of guy who is open to being on camera for YouTube.  Dating is a personal thing, so exposing yourself in a capacity like this requires vulnerability in a public domain.  

Also, it's not free.  I'm going to do the heaviest possible discount to get this content out, but I also need to live and likely pay for some content/editing help.  

I NEED 2 GUYS, and ONLY TWO guys.  

If you're interested in the transformation on camera or helping with content and editing off camera, email me jakepulls@gmail.com.  I will choose the best 2 candidates and this isn't a 100% happening idea yet, I've just always wanted to do it and I figure it would be cool for YouTube.  

Other news...  

A month or two ago I attended the Owen Cook live Free Tour Seminar.  For those of you who are old like me, I'm talking about Tyler from The Game.  For whatever reason I still struggle calling him Owen lol.  But anyways I was there and I was astonished.  About 150+ people showed up to downtown and to me it was incredible to watch.  There was a hypnotist who signed up maybe 75 people to get transformation, and after that Owen talked for like 5 hours non-stop and signed a bunch of people up for training.  The guy has great stage presence and comfort, and although it was tough for me to always follow his "free form" style, it was cool to watch.  

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous.  

I'd (of course) love to do a chat like that and to have the opportunity to get on a stage in front of that many people.  For years all I gave a shit about was game game game and why why why.  Tyler was over there building his business and wow what a job he did.

After the seminar, Owen asked me if I wanted to come to the (paid) seminar to help out and I was like hell yeah.  So a couple weeks later I came and helped with the seminar.  There were about 50 people there, and I quickly learned that Owen is teaching personal branding, speaking from stage, stage presence, and other modern forms of the same social skills we've taught for so many years already.  

The "Cherry on top" (as he called it) was the in-field time.  

We went out to Venice after the seminar at like 12:30am and spend basically a "power hour" doing gaming.  Many of the guys (and a couple girls!) out with the group were approaching, and most guys approaching had no problem opening some women.  I was able to help out, give advice where I could, and I even "pulled" a chick in front of a couple students as a demo.  Obviously I didn't really pull the girl cause I have a woman and two kids, so it was more like a guy fishing who catches a fish, shows it to his friends, then gently releases the fish back into the water.  Trust me though when I say, I know when it's pull and when it's not going to be.  I've known for a very, very long time... 

Wanna be stunned like I was?  NO ONE AT THE TRAINING HAD ANY TRAINING OR OPENERS.  

I couldn't believe it.  There was a 20 year follower of Owen taking his first workshop and he just approached being like "hey guys what's up what's your name?  Where are you from" and my jaw was on the floor.  I was so confused that I had to ask Tyler like what's the deal??? You only go out for an hour?  He's like "yeah man it's just the cherry on top for the seminar.  we all go out and game, and some people take it seriously, some people just wanna see me game, some guys wanna use it for a sales skillset development, etc."  My jaw was on the floor, and he informed me that basically in his eyes the pickup market is kinda dead.  

Is the pickup market dead???  What do you think?  

The next move for Owen is to "do stadiums" as he put it.  He even told the seminar that if they want pickup training, to "get it now before it's gone."  His 5 hour talk was, in his words, "for legacy purposes."  Here I am wishing I had eyeballs and he's working on legacy.  

Man, do I have some work to do...  

I still can't wait to coach more, and I feel entirely under utilized and ill-accomplished.  I've not yet succeeded in getting my message out, and I don't think I'll stop pursuing this until I do.  

It's odd what I'm seeing these days as far as dating.  Everyone is confused, basically, and some of what we did 20 years ago has permeated society.  A new generation of guy are using pickup information, and "Mogging" is even a mainstream term.  WTFFF??   It's been a looooong time since I was thinking about amogging.  

Maybe I'm crazy?  but I do see some younger guys coaching online, and I just don't see men meeting women going away anytime soon.  Regardless, this is what I love and I plan on throwing my hat in the ring here before I give up.  

Back to the seminar. 

The most astonishing thing I witnessed first hand at Owen's seminar was for sure the really amazing vibes from everyone, coaches included.  Everyone was getting some great speaking training and help with social skills, the people were all welcoming to one another, and the overall vibe was amazingly positive.  I've also not ever seen a $200k Miami fashion week weekend pitched before, but that's another story for another time.  

Overall impression of Owen's free tour:  Impressive as fuck.  Hat's off to him and the great job he's doing for people.  I'd recommend you check it out when it's in your city.  Who knows, I might even be back myself.  I'm happy I reached out to him to attend.  We've known each other for so long and I had never been to see his seminar before.  

Other than that, I'm still coaching as much or more than ever and still going at it.  I do have to wear glasses sometimes cause I guess we all start going blind at this age, but other than that I'm same old Jake just with more finished cars.  

Cheers and chat soon!  Thanks for reading and thanks for your continued comments, follows, subs, and support!  

New Video on The Dating Mansions!

How To Save Your Relationship Without Therapy

The secret screening mechanism.....

 

How to Make Women Hit on You

 What's up pickup fam.  It's Jake and I'm making some videos on YouTube now as Jake Payton.  I'll also be on linkedin, twitter (Click here for link to Social medias) , and starting to do some shorts on if I can figure out how to edit, etc.  If you're a ninja at this I NEED YOU so we can exchange services.  Currently I'm in North Carolina.  

Anyways, here's the video and I hope you like it..

Pickup Guy Approached Jake P. & Student... Poorly.

Hey guys long time no pen.  

For whatever reason, YouTube has been on my mind a lot lately and I'm thinking of doing a video or two or a hundred.  Anything you'd like to see?  I'm thinking right now I might do a "Blogpost Series" where I go through all of these old blogposts and do videos on them.  What do you think?  Comment below.  

Additionally I wanna tell you about someone who did an approach on my student and I while we were in a set last weekend.  

So I'm coaching my latest client and a guy comes up and to our 5 set (me, student, 3 women) and just interrupts all of us saying "What's up everybody?"  

Then he stares at us all as if we're supposed to be his best friend, and I'll be honest with you... if I hadn't immediately thought he was a pickup student I'd have ignored him entirely, or worse.  Instead, I decided to pause and see what the group would do with the guy, and since everyone was warmed up and in a good laughing mood (because of me), they let him in.  

Later I ended up somehow standing next to the guy and I asked him "So how's the pickup going?" which is probably the least enjoyable question to get when you're new at approaching people.  Of course he's like "Oh what do you mean?" and I explained to him that I know what he's doing and I'm a coach so he can drop the oblivious act.  

So what is this whole thing about?  

1.  OPENING A GROUP OF 5 PEOPLE BY TRYING TO ADDRESS ALL OF THEM AT ONCE IS DUMB.  

2.  IF YOU'RE WANTING TO GET INTO A GROUP, OPEN ONE PERSON IN THE GROUP (GIRL OR GUY) AND INCLUDE WHOEVER DECIDED TO LOOK.  

3.  OPEN WITH IMPACT YOU IDIOT!!!  

Let's go through these one by one in a bit more detail:

First off let's chat about opening groups with more than 3 people in them.  When I first started approaching, I had heard that it's a think to just open like 8 people by getting their attention all at once.  Total horse shit.  I tried this many many times, and in fact I did it while coaching often, and it always turned out poorly because people just don't do this.  Alpha males don't do this.  

Here's what happened to me:  I made a damned fool of myself.  

The reality here is that it's a MUCH better play to just position yourself on the side of the group, wait for an opening, then open someone on the edge of the group.  If someone else starts listening to you then address them with your eyes and include them that way.  Then when you're accepted by those first couple people it'll be much more likely that you'll get accepted by the group.  

That very same night I was coaching and that very thing happened to me.  I chatted with 2 girls at the back of the drink like and they happened to be with two more who were adjacent to them.  They joined, the girls let them know "he's cool" and then all was good.  They loved me.  

Next up, opening with impact.  

Sorry guys, "What's up everybody" isn't going to cut it.  It's low impact and assumes FAR too much that you'll get compliance from the group you're opening.  The reality here is that if you're not offering obvious value of some sort (like maybe you look super cool or you have a couple chicks with you), asking people what's up and then not saying anything just pisses people off.  You know what I thought?  I'm like "So that's it motherfucker?"  

BORING.  

So open with some impact.  Talk about a funny situation you just saw, give a compliment, do an opener that's professionally scripted and has been proven to work well, etc.   

DON'T BE AN IDIOT.  

That's all for today guys, thanks for reading.  

☕ PLEASE CONSIDER SUBSCRIBING TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL!  

YouTube.com/jakepulls

💰 Join My Private Dating Forum & Masterclasses: https://www.jakepayton.com/sales-page 🚀 Website: https://www.jakepayton.com 🚀 Old School Blog (what you're on right now): http://jakepulls.blogspot.com 🚀 Social Media: - All Links: https://www.jakepayton.com/social-media - Facebook: http://fb.com/jakepaytonofficial - Twitter: http://twitter.com/jakepulls - Instagram: http://instagram.com/jakepaytonofficial - Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jake_payton - Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/jake-payton-5969221a6 - Snapchat: https://www.snapchat.com/add/snapjakep ## - Remember, YOU can do this. JAkE. ##

Nothing To See Here... Much Longer

Hey guys, long time no pen.

I hope you're all doing super well and getting through this whole 'Rona bullshit without harm to you and yours.  Truly I do.

As for me, I've been holed up in my West Hollywood apartment for awhile.  First two weeks of quarantine for me were basically a daily beer and weed festival with occasional Netflix (if i'm honest I did watch the Tiger King lol), so that was fun for a bit.   I've been collecting some vinyl and enjoying my 70's McIntosh Stereo system to it's fullest as well, and no covid "me lung flu long time" for me, so I'm lucky.  

But!  As most things do, TV, beers, weed and sex got old and boring, so I started getting back to getting some work done.  I can report that I've done a couple cool things, and I'm working on even more cool things.

First off, some free content!  My older brother has decided to start his own YouTube show/podcast, so he asked me to do an interview about my journey through dating and business.  We chatted last night for a little over an hour and 15 minutes about everything from my first approach using Horsegirl to my current business situation.  It's a little personal for me to let everyone in on my family, but at this point i'm kinda like fuck it, let it roll, you know?

Click here to watch the video interview

One thing you guys might be interested in taking a peek at is that my brother is a total natural.  He was a 4-sport letter winner in high school and went on to get a college scholarship and try out as a punter for the NFL.

I've always tried to understand how he's so good at making fast friends with people, and I've even pitched him to see if he'd make a tutorial for girlfriend fast lane on jakepayton.com to explain what he's doing.  He's not a "conscious" guy about what he's doing though, so who knows if that'll ever happen.  One things for sure though, he can walk in a bar and be friends with new people in 5 seconds, the asshole!  I never had it that easy, and I'm anything but a sports guy.  In fact, growing up people didn't even call me Jake, they called me "DJ's little brother."  Fucking dicks.

Anyways, I think you'll enjoy the interview so that's why i'm posting it.

The next thing coming down the pipeline is i've started new or updated all my social media finally!

You can follow me on the major 7 platforms including NEWLY ADDED TikTok and Linkedin!  Just click on these links pretty pretty please if you would:

https://twitter.com/jakepulls
https://www.facebook.com/jakepaytonofficial/
https://www.instagram.com/jakepaytonofficial/
https://vm.tiktok.com/WqupAN/
http://linkedin.com/in/jake-payton-5969221a6
https://www.youtube.com/user/jakepulls

Other things going on...

So I've been still coaching a TON throughout this quarantine.  I've also been having some amazing long chats with an old Brad P. coach that we've been recording, and we're conjuring up a way to use the audio from them for content, so you'll see that coming through soon perhaps in audio or otherwise.  I'm finally to the point where I'm past the old girlfriend fast lane website woes, so now that the website functions without breaking I can focus on free content and growing the brand.  I truly hope you'll join me for the ride and be some of the first guys to help me grow.  Any time that you can share and spread the word you'll be helping this 13 year devoted dating guy keep going at it without dropping out or selling out.  After all, the reality is that there isn't another guy in the WORLD who has the ability to make girls approach him like I do, and I gave you guys that free content first almost 8 years ago in the "She's Not Even In the Fucking Room" Post.

But there's some bad news too...

This blog will stay here, but I'm planning on completely stopping writing on it.  To take it's place, I'm putting the blog right on jakepayton.com where I can re-write and perfect the old content, and you guys won't be hearing endless pitches from me anymore, lol.  I'm gonna give out tons of free shit, and the paid stuff will be for guys who want personal help.

In other words, I'm gonna try and grow up.  In fact, I'll be turning 40 years old next month (May, 2020).  But don't think that'll stop me from hitting the bars for the next 10 years and giving this shit a go for as long as possible.  With any luck my old crotchety ass will be wheeled into bars in my wheelchair so I can watch guys do approaches from the comfort of some space cart Elon Musk will probably develop soon for the geriatric.  HA!

So that's it for today guys.  I'd like to thank those of you who have been along with me in this past 13 and a half years now since I started coaching.  It's been nothing but wild, and today I was hunting through past nudie pics i've got and I was wowed at the amazing journey i've had since I was a super frustrated chumpy total NEWB.

Now i'm not though.

Cheers guys, I love ya!  Keep yourselves safe and stay the fuck inside!  See if you can masterbate on live chat with girls from dating sites until we can all get back into the bars.  I'll catch up with you very soon...

It's Alive! The New Girlfriend Fastlane & Black Friday Deal.

Hey guys!  Quick message today that the new website is up and going and faster and better than ever. Please come and check it out.  You'll get about 50% off for Black Friday, too!  This is literally over for good in 4 days, so please do not delay.  See you in there!

CLICK HERE 

Here's the REAL MAGIC PILL You've been searching for. Not a joke.

Yooooo guys!  Hi again.  I know it's been awhile.

Today I wanna talk about what's been on my mind lately, and it's likely something you've not heard before.  Spoiler alert:  I'm not selling you anything today, so just a good read.

First off, though, a quick update on the new website.  Yes, the new website is coming down the pipeline.  I had an unfortunate setback with a web developer and lost a significant amount of time and money, but I assure you I'm working through this problem and the new website is going to be better than ever...  (like, it'll have a homepage and it'll work without issues, lol).  I could still use some help though, so if you're a guy with more time and skills than budget, get ahold of me!  I'm searching hard for someone capable of video editing on Adobe Premier Pro and I need some graphic design, so if you've got those I'm happy to take you out and get you some women.  Email me at jakepulls@gmail.com if this is you.  It's a chance to get free coaching and get into my inner circle, and if your game is in my mind it's a very good thing.

The other update going on is that I'm about 90% booked out till the end of January right now (woohoo!) so if you want some coaching you can still get some, there are just not any full weekends available until February.

Okay, updates over.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about the evolution of game.  I've been chatting with some "older" students who have trained with every company across the board, and when they find out my dominance struggle theory they go crazy.  Not joking, they go fucking crazy and get super excited.

"You mean I don't just have to go out and say all these crazy memorized routines and hope they stick?"

Correct.

"Wait, but is this natural???"

No.

"So what is it?"

It's the ability to flex your creative muscle in order to create a dominance struggle.  And it's what I believe to be the single most important factor in determining how good you'll be with women for the rest of your life.  

Let me explain.

I'm sure many of you guys are listening to Joe Rogan's podcast, and to me the life of a comedian has many similarities with the life of a guy who is learning dating.  We both do "sets," and we both go through this ABSOLUTELY CRAZY task of flopping like hell until we ever-so-slowly learn our skill set bit-by-bit.  The end result is that to the layman you are just killing it!  You're prepared for any and everything someone might think in their head or try and do to you before they ever attempt it.  I can literally count down the seconds until a girl approaches me or re-opens me, and it's a symptom of the original "embrace and extend" theory that Brad P. taught me years and years ago.

The concept is this:  When you embrace the concept behind a routine because you've done that routine a bunch, you'll soon start to branch off of the original words and use the concept in different places.  This extension in your ability to use the theory opens up new doors to new things to say, and when you write those things down, you can repeat them forever and they always work, and it's because the original concept or theory behind the routine you learned still works.

Got it?

So what happens when you can do this with dominance struggles and how does that relate to the current state of game that's taught across the dating industry?

First off, it's obvious that much of the dating industry still teaches routines (myself included).  They're a great way to start you out and get you through the initial stages of overcoming your fear and being able to open and start getting attraction.  Cool.  The problem with this method of coaching was that students experienced extreme backlash from women when women "found out" that the student wasn't as charismatic as he was professing to be.  Often and expectedly, the routines were delivered terribly with poor facial expression, tonality, and overall energy, and it caused havoc.

Enter "Natural Game."

Backlash from what you could call really really unnatural game caused the industry to adjust.  Now the plan was to sell "Natural Game," which I can only imagine was some dumb "be yourself" shit that coaches tries to adjust to or something?  I'm not sure, I never jumped on this marketing train.  It's important to note though that GUYS FUCKING KNEW that pickup and routines were unnatural, even when those guys were not the most social guys.

Okay, so we started with super unnatural game, then went to trying to do the most natural game ever (read:  guys flopping super miserably).

So what's the end game here?  Where does the dating industry end up?

The way I see it, we end up teaching a way of gaming that absolutely appear natural in every way to the woman.  In other words, you didn't walk up from 20 feet away, you didn't say an awkward long memorized line, and you have plausible deniability that you're even making an approach.  In other words, should she accuse you of hitting on her you could EASILY make a quick and solid argument against that frame.  (quick for instance, if you said "Uh, you bumped into me lady.  Get over yourself.")

So what's the minimum amount of canned "game" we need and how can we make this process seem absolutely like "it just happened" to the woman?  What MUST we do and what can we absolutely not do?

Well, there are things that you absolutely cannot NOT do.

For instance, you can't NOT open (until you're at a higher level and you can do my "she's not even in the room" stuff, which for the record I've never seen another human be able to do).  To make your opening as natural as possible, it MUST be situational,  it MUST be something normal guys would say, or it MUST be a spin on something a normal guy would say.

Spoiler alert:  I already teach exactly this, and you can do it.  You already do.

Second thing you can't not do:  You also can't NOT continue speaking after you open a girl.  You simply MUST continue talking after your opener.  You talk 100% and she talks 0%.  This is the rule.  Be the guy you are around your friends and family who doesn't hold back in any way.  Show her 100% the true you.

That covers opening and the beginning of attraction.

Next up, what's the end-game of attraction?

News Flash:  It's dominance struggles.  Women screen first by seeing if your level of social dominance is even worth paying attention to, then by trying to socially dominate you for clarification of your value.  THAT'S IT.  Done.

Now we come to the interesting part of things, because if you're a guy who just doesn't communicate enough value to the woman in front of you, then you won't be able to practice dominance struggles.  She'll simply not respond to you and you won't get tested by her, and not you can't practice this most important skill in the entire world.  Womp.  That sucks.

So we need a method for practicing dominance struggles, and we need it to be natural and not routine-y.

This is where our creativity is necessary.

The task at hand for a guy learning dating is to be able to practice the dominance struggle "dance," and the minimum way we can do this is by giving you... you guessed it... a canned line!

Yayyyy, more canned shit... I know.

It's important though!  It's a very small, short line, and it's the ONLY line you'll ever have to learn, I assure you.

Remember earlier when I talked about embracing a concept and then extending it?  This small bit of a beginning script is the FIRST STEP you'll take towards gaining the skill set of CREATING DOMINANCE STRUGGLES WITHOUT SCRIPTS.

Now stop, please.  This is the single most important thing I can possibly tell you in your whole life.

When you can create dominance struggles "on the fly" or seemingly out of nowhere with a woman, and you can do so in the context of a role-play, you will never in your life struggle with women ever again.  

Let's talk about the IMMENSE benefits of this:

1.  100% Natural, because it's based on what you're already seeing, hearing, and feeling in that moment.

2.  MINIMUM AMOUNT OF "CANNED" or "SCRIPTED" LINES.   Literally it's one fucking line I give you and maybe an opener or two which have now become a few words you're already saying.  This is literally the minimum you can do of using lines.

3.  Allows you a platform for practice and development of your dominance struggling skill set (the skills you'll need your entire life if you want to keep a women or get infinitely many new women).

4.  Always maximizes your chances at getting attraction, because women use this screen to literally decide if they're attracted.

5.  Over time you develop your creativity more and more, and in doing so you become more and more "natural" in your appearance to the women you meet.  Yes, you're using a theory, but you're using it in the way YOU use it.  This means its 100% congruent.  You can't be "caught" doing this because it'll never come off like a line.

So that's it.  The "end game" for everyone and anyone in the dating industry will be to learn this simple formula of being able to open in a seemingly natural and therefore plausibly deniable way and then creatively start a dominance struggle (as a means to attraction) with the woman in front of you.

(Note here that when I'm talking about opening, I'm talking about obeying the first rule of attraction, which is that for a girl to get attracted to you, she has to NOT know if she could "get you.")

Also, for good measure let's throw in the 2nd rule of attraction (first time announcing this):

The second rule of attraction is that if a girl somehow gets the idea that she could have you if she wants to, you must CREATE DOUBT in her mind if you want to get that girl.

...and by doubt I mean real, plausible doubt, not just saying something like "whatever you couldn't have me!" or some other uncalibrated shit.  She must actually get the idea that she was wrong about her initial impression.

So that's it.

The "end game" for the dating industry gives guys who are learning about women:

1.  The ability to open in a plausibly deniable way so that the woman doesn't instantly think she could have the guy if she wanted

and

2.  The ability to learn and practice how to attract women using the woman's own screening mechanism.  

Do you know anyone else's method in the dating industry that accomplishes both of these?  I sure don't.

And by the way, these two points have EXTREME BENEFITS FOR THE STUDENT!

1.  When you can open in a plausibly deniable way, it eliminates approach anxiety!  When you don't feel like she "knows" you're hitting on her, how nervous do you feel?  Probably not nervous at all, right?  Yeah... me neither.

2.  When you can practice beating a woman's screening mechanism, you're like a comic working on his material over and over until you can creatively do this in a fun way for you, and there is no better way to keep you interested in the process.

It should be FUN to hit on women!

It should NOT be scary, anxiety-inducing punishment that makes you wanna stay at home, get high, order a pizza, eat it, then jerk off to porn while getting fatter by the minute, only to end up a super-alone creepy weirdo.

Cool.  So that's my lesson today.  Hope you liked it.

For more on this visit girlfriendfastlane.com or email me:  jakepulls@gmail.com

See you guys soon.

The Four Relationship Conditions

If I'm honest, not a lot of things interest me in the dating realm anymore, because honestly at this point I feel like I've heard it all.  However, one thing that does interest me is creating brand new, profound ways to understand the dating process, and today I'd like to share one such realization with you.  

That realization is that no matter who you have met or what you would tell others your relationship is like with a girl, your relationship will fall into one of four categories.  Furthermore, I would bet money that unless you understand today's post and how your actions relate to it, that ALL your relationships throughout your life will likely fall into the same exact category, every time.  

Why, you ask?

Because the condition of your relationship is determined by levels of eagerness in your words and in your actions.  In fact for most guys, eagerness in words and actions amount to a behavioral condition around women that lasts for life.  It's difficult if not impossible to change unless you're aware of it, so let's open your eyes for a bit here...

First off, let's talk about the 4 relationship conditions.  They are:

1.  Underqualified for the girl

2.  Overqualified for the girl

3.  Stringing the girl along

4.  Boyfriend Potential/Further relationship potential

So how does this affect your life?  

Well, let's say that you're a guy who is continually not getting results from new interactions.  If this is the case then it's likely that you're a guy who is consistently becoming under qualified for the girl in some way.  It's also likely that this is happening quickly upon meeting the girl because that's when she's saying no.  

Another example.  Let's say that you're losing women, but they're dumping you 6 months into the relationship.  Well, it's likely that you might have started out with some boyfriend potential, then you had further relationship potential, and then finally you became under qualified for the girl and then she dumped you... womp.  

It's important to understand that these conditions are caused by your level of eagerness in your words and actions, and that's because eagerness is quite closely related to attraction.  You could be (in no specific order):

-eager with your words and actions

-eager with your words but not your actions

-not eager with your words or actions

-not eager with your words and not eager with your actions

*Each one of these conditions creates a specific relationship condition from above.*

Now it's important to remember that eagerness itself isn't necessarily bad!  It's how each individual woman interprets your eagerness that you should be aware of, and this is often where compatibility lies for those who have no awareness of their own actions and how they might affect a woman's emotional state and level of attraction.   In other words, if you're clueless then you might be a guy who ends up under qualified his whole life until one specific woman interprets your actions in a different way than the others have.   Then and only then would this type of guy say "She's the ONE!!!!" and fall in love.  Well, that is until she eventually interpreted his eagerness differently and then dumped him again cause he's under qualified.  

So there you have it.  Your levels of eagerness in your words and actions directly result in one of the four relationship conditions I've talked about above.  

Which one are you falling into and how can you change it?  

So that's it for today guys.  For more on this or to watch a specific video tutorial describing every aspect of this in thorough detail, join the revolution at girlfriendfastlane.com.  I'll see you in there!  

Oh, and btw if you haven't seen my list of free text messages to send yet, I updated it a few days ago and you can check it out by Clicking Here.  Be sure not to miss the new "Space Force" text, lol.  

See you next time,

Jake

Help! My Numbers are Wood

HEre's an old post I wrote in July of 2008:

At some point in your progress through the game, you might find out that you can open, attract, kino, and get numbers well. Great. However, many people that are in this position will get those numbers but convert them into a very low percentage of dates. I, myself had the "lots of numbers in LA but tons of flakes" problem and at first I got frustrated. Very soon after I crushed the problem with a huge fucking hammer.  

What I found out though is that attraction and kino is enough for the moment, but only THAT moment. The long-term result of attraction and kino that are done perfectly is that the girl will DEFINITELY remember you, but probably not feel CONNECTED with you. This is why she won't answer your texts or call you back.  

How do I get her connected, you ask? You can establish that connection in a few ways, but right here i'd like to talk about three of them with you.

1. Establishing commonalities
2. Conveying your identity with sincerity about what's happening with the two of you
3. Truthfulness with built-in rapport breaking

So here we go.  

1. Establishing commonalities. This one's self explanatory, but the basic formula is to get the girl talking, then when she says she did X thing, you're going to say anything and everything that you know about that thing. In my case, I wear two rings on my left hand. One's from Bali, Indonesia and the other is from my trip to Ibiza, Spain. Anytime the girl talks about traveling (and they all do) then I tell them about my travels and how I wear my trips on my hand. Works wonderfully. A commonality can be as ingrained as that, or it could be something stupid like "Oh you drink Diet Coke? No shit so do i. OMG i'm so addicted to it and I found out through my addiction that everyone who drinks diet coke it addicted. Crazy huh?" Done. Do this well with just one thing that's deeper like my traveling thing and you can get laid from it, or just do it with some smaller things like the diet coke thing. Calibrate this to the depth, intelligence level, and energy level of the girl and situation and you're golden. Learn this calibration through trial and error.

2. Conveying your identity. If you've attracted the girl and kino'd her, but she looks back on the interaction and doesn't know "What you are" (and can't tell her friends) then she won't answer phone calls. What are you and why will she find out?

In my case, I look like a rocker so girls always ask if i'm in a band, or what I do. That's the why of why she'll find out. The "what I am" will come when she asks. When she does, I tell her the honest story about how and why I came to Hollywood (leaving out the dating thing of course). I tell her a quick synopsis of important older events of my life and how they lead me to my current situation. This story shouldn't be super long.

Here's the important part, and the super-successful way that it gets both of us on the same page. So at this point in the interaction, i've opened, she's attracted, i've been kinoing, and i've established some commonalities. 

I usually say something like "Oh, where i'm from X happens or X is how we do something." This prompts her to ask about where i'm from and what brought me to Hollywood. Are you with me here?  

When she asks, I start to act like i'm going to tell her, then I stop, change my tone to a more genuine/serious one, slow it down and "Are we.....? (quick pause) Do you really want to know?" 

When I say "Are we....?" I kind of do a back and forth motion from me to her with my hand. I'm basically saying to her "Are we getting somewhere with this and is this a serious inquiry into my life from somebody who's genuinely interested in me and a possible sexual/intimate relationship OR if it's not then ......."  

**Note that this is a great place to isolate the girl! "It's kinda loud here, let's go over here for a second."**

Does this make sense? I'll tell you that after the word OR in the previous sentance that I don't know what happens there because I've never heard them say no. EVERYTIME they get more serious, I "closen" the kino (make it more intimate, like a bf and gf would do) and they get VERY serious about listening to me. This is a great time to get them to sit on your lap or escalate towards a makeout. It almost always happens after this. Are you with me here?

3. Truthfullness with built-in rapport breaking. This is a simple concept that TONS of guys REALLY FUCKUP in pickup and when talking with women. Basically it's this: Be honest. I'm not talking about spilling something you shouldn't. I'm talking about being honest about your likes and dislikes.  

I'll give you an example: The girl says something like "I like the band Nickelback. They're my favorite." Let's say for a second that you don't like Nickelback (thereby making you awesome). A lot of guys who hate Nickelback in this situation wouldn't say something like "Fuck that, I hate Nickelback. They can smoke my pole" because somehow they have something telling them in their head that if they don't like what the girl likes then they won't be qualified to be with this chick and/or she won't like them if they say something negative about something the girl likes. Instead what comes out is "Hmmm, well they're okay, but I really like X." Guess what's happened here?  You've accepted her frame in an attempt to gain rapport with her.  

This is a pretty subtle thing to pickup on and learn, but it's something everyone learning pickup should understand eventually. I call it being honest with built-in rapport breaking because you're not going to ever run into a girl who has everything in the world in common with you, so when you actually take the honest road on these types of things and tell the girl your honest opinion, you're essentially breaking rapport with her and inviting her to now accept your frame of, in this case, how sucky Nickelback is. Make sense? You're demonstrating that you don't care about if she likes you or not (non-neediness), inviting her to try and chase you and accept your frame (dominance). Do this and observe how many times the girl will be the one who backpedals, saying something like "Well, you're right, they're not the best" or something like that. She does this because you've shown her that you'll be honest even at the cost of her not liking you, and now that she can't lump you in with all the guys who do this, she's attracted and now doesn't want to lose you!. Wow. What a great result! All you had to do was be honest about shit! I really hope this sinks in with anyone reading because I think it's a fantastic thing to learn.

The 90 Degree Rule & How to Stand When you First Meet A Girl

Should Beginners Adopt a "Screening" Frame

Should you have a screening frame when you're just starting out meeting women?  

Okay, so having a "screening frame" when you're meeting women is the idea that you can meet women and give her the idea that you're screening her.  In other words, you have your choice of women and you're deciding if she's good enough.  Some pros advocate adopting a "screening frame" when you talk with women, saying basically that if you can do that it'll help your game.  

Personally, I love this concept of having a screening frame and it's definitely something I personally have.  In fact, it's the mark of a guy who has abundance, because when you have abundance you're actually screening for real.

The problem with just telling guys "go and try to have a screening frame and it'll help" is that the information is VERY poorly timed for the student and has little to no practical application associated with it that would allow the information to actually be used properly.  It would be like me just telling a student "Go try to be confident, it'll help."  Well, if you don't have confidence, or in this case a "screening frame" then it doesn't really help students to tell them to do that.

Let's go down this rabbit-hole together, starting with a concept called "information timing"...

"Information timing" is that idea that the only information that's going to help you grow as a student is information that you can apply at that very moment, and anything else will either go straight over your head or worse, it could hurt your game even.

For instance, let's say I tell a virgin all about how to aggressively kino (touch) a girl.  This information would be quite poorly timed for him.  It would likely be FAR over his head, and if he was unlucky enough to believe the advice I tell him enough to actually go and do some aggressive kino, he could have some very negative consequences.  He could get slapped or even arrested for some type of sexual crime, and obviously this would be a terrible result.

The same is true for this piece of advice a pro might give, it's extremely poorly timed for almost the entirety of his students, and if they go out and try to do this, it's likely going to kill their game because in practice they will most certainly apply this information incorrectly.

Allow me to talk about my experience here first, then we're going to talk about practical application of this concept.

When I was coming up in the game I heard about the concept of screening a girl VERY early on.   It came in the form of a Mystery routine (that's the dude mystery, not "something that is difficult or impossible to understand or explain").  In the routine you tell the girl something to the effect of "Tell me three things about yourself that I would like."  --Ugh, just writing that makes me wanna puke, because I remember actually saying this to a girl and getting my ass handed to me.  I got a "WTF" look from a hot girl and she was like "Bitch, tell me three things I'd like about you, cause I don't see any right now from where I'm at."---  "oh shit..."  

So did adopting the "screening frame" help me?

Fuck... No.  

It didn't help because it was poorly timed information for me and because I didn't have a practical way to apply the information.

Now let's talk about what actually happened to me when I was learning game.

First, I went out and tried and tried and tried non-stop like 5 days a week (or more sometimes) until I learned all my basic skills and was getting numbers and a few dates.  Then I came to Hollywood (a huge culture shock for me being from Iowa) and spent 3 full months gaming before I got laid.  From there, Brad told me "I don't even wanna see you until you've got a rotation."  I think within a few weeks I had one, and then the very next week I went from dating 3 girls to dating 7.  This is what it looks like when you're starting to get abundance.

Now I had a time problem.

To me, 7 girls is manageable, but back then and for most guys it's not.  You start forgetting who is who and I had to start making myself notes on my phone of who each girl was so I could remember where I met her.  Try it.  Go try turning 100 sets a week into 30 phone numbers and then 7 girls you're dating and tell me if you need notes... I did.

What starts happening is that the confusion, lack of time, moral concerns, and everything else kick in and you're literally forced to start telling some women no.  You start not returning texts, telling girls you're taken, telling new ones you don't wanna date that you have a girlfriend, etc. just to get them to go away because you know that you don't have time for them and they're just not good enough for you anyways.  The only new girls you do have time for are girls who you deem "better" than the one or ones that you're currently seeing.

THIS IS SCREENING.

Screening came as a direct NEED from having abundance.  Once you have a rotation of women and you're having sex all the time, you simply won't have enough time for all of the women who want you, and you'll start finding ways to say no.

First off, you'll stop caring.  Once you've got your first rotation of three women, you'll be having sex with 1-3 girls every day and literally there is a physical and mental change in your entire being.  This is not something you can mimic as a beginner, and if you haven't experienced this yet I highly recommend it.

That lack of caring causes you not to feel a lot of the needs that you previously had that were causing you to act "weird" and have lack of success as a result.  You stop being as attentive to women, you stop agreeing with everything they say, you stop trying so hard, and you start to become more audacious about standing up for yourself and generally about handling things you're now starting to see as women's "bullshit" as I like to call it.

At this point, your results multiply at an exponential rate.  Things get easier and easier, and you'll experience HUGE paradigm shifts in your thinking from time to time.  Abundance and screening are first, and after that you can expect about 1-2 huge realizations each year I'd say, and I'm talking about Earth-rattling realizations that are so profound you believe there won't be another one... until there is another one.  Then another, and another.  I believe there have been about 10, maybe 11 times this has happened to me, and each time I think there's no way this could happen again.  "I'm just too far along in this process to not be done yet" I think.

Now I say all this all at the risk of sounding super-duper braggy because I want to illustrate fully the path you're on when you start to screen.  Again, it's a result of abundance, NOT a cause.

So can you "fake it till you make it?" 

Well, you'll NEVER be able to truly fake all the things that come along with true abundance... you just won't.  Women can smell this shit a mile away, especially the hot ones...

***Side note: A 42 year-old ex-10 (super duper hot girl who now is single and 42 for whatever reason) has a SERIOUS problem on her hands because she's used to screening for and getting guys who have abundance using her social dominance techniques, yet now her looks don't warrant attention from those same men.  Uh oh.

Now she's in a situation where she has trouble being attracted to any guy she can reasonably attain, because she won't be attracted to any guy who can't get through her screening.  In other words, she is only attracted to guys who are socially dominant enough to get through her screening, and her screening is now at it's best because at her highest level of experience, yet she can't attract those guys now because she's too old and guys who have that ability would just choose a hotter younger girl.

This is why women marry for money... because they can't get a dominant male anymore, so the next best thing is having a lavish lifestyle with a beta male whom they can control.  They reason that he's dominant to appease themselves in their mind because he's in a position of wealth, but this is mostly delusional.***

So back to faking your way through screening... lol.

So there are some things you can do, and these are things that practically can be taught using live coaching.  These are things like breaking rapport, showing outcome independence, sticking up for yourself, challenging her back when you're challenged, not accepting her frame, etc.  These are the skills you need to win a dominance struggle, and they can be taught as they come up situation-by-situation in live-game.

Oh wait, sorry, nobody knows what dominance struggles are yet...  (second forehead slap).  Dammit, why didn't I work on my business more and not just have sex all day everyday for a decade...

Anyways, moving on...

The point of this whole story is that if you're a beginner you shouldn't be worrying AT ALL about trying to adopt a "screening frame."  The reality is that you won't have one in the beginning, and that's fine.

Did you hear me clearly there???  It's fine!

Until you do have a screening frame for real, you can start learning individual concepts that you'll later have when you work hard enough to get the real screening frame, and those concepts will help you with something far more pressing:  learning how to dominance struggle with the women you meet.

So just to be clear, here is the process of learning pickup:

1.  Fix your fashion.  It's your ticket to the game.

2.  Do whatever you need to do to be able to start conversations with women.  Conversations are your learning platform for skills like attraction, etc.  Don't not open girls because you're working on your inner game.

3.  Incite dominance struggles in your conversations in order to learn how women screen so you can beat what they're doing.  Do this not and you'll spend a lot of time not getting screened at all and wondering what the hell to do in game.  (I spent YEARS that I could have saved if I had known this).

4.  Beat women in the dominance struggles you create and watch in amazement as you start to get attraction all the time and have sex all the time and create abundance in your life.

5.  Adopt a screening frame because you NEED to, not because you TRIED to.

The End.

Thanks for reading...